The song is ‘I DON’T NEED YOU’ by Andy Mineo. A synopsis of it would be the thoughts and behaviour patterns, we form after we often get disappointed by people we may have trusted. But it’s also a peek into the mind of someone more prone to rely on themselves than on others despite the situation. The ending is a somber reflection of why this feeling of ‘I’ll do it all myself’ tends to arise. This line in particular helps highlight it:
“These walls I built
Each brick is a disappointment”.
It should be clear why this song ended up resonating with me so well. As an introvert from birth, when social interactions can be so cumbersome and complicated. Withdrawal is always the easier path. And with time, you turn into a loner. You might have tried before to rely on people or do your best to get along. But then you got wonderful reminders of how great humans tend to be. Yourself included of course. The blame sprayed like a paintball machine gun. Everybody gets splattered. And you slowly build the ‘I don’t need anyone else’ mindset. People just get in the way and are often unhelpful. And have you tried ever maintaining even the simplest relationship? It’s a whole lot of effort for both parties. Effort that can be spent watching anime or playing video games. By yourself, in perfect peace and stillness. Unfortunately the years roll by and you realize that humans are inherently built for companionship. And you might have tried to escape it. But you can’t cheat nature. The nights are kind of lonely sometimes. The days often find you longing for someone to be there. But why bother, you’ll just push them away. Or they wouldn’t understand. Or they leave. Or you feel the constant need to prove your worth. It’s tiring, far more tiring than enduring the bouts of ‘alone’. The search for genuine people is too laborious and unrewarding. It’s effort that can be spent on self improvement. Or finally ridding yourself of the curse of companionship.
Nii Sackey's Writing Collection 